im so drunk with asians
where?
always
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
Hi. I probably already told you this mid puke, but thanks again for babysitting me last night. How did I get in the car?
the party we were at had security guards carrying paintball guns. that probably should have been the first sign
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
youre just mad because i have donuts and im beautiful
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
He's the second guy this morning whose job is jeopardized because of my vagina.
You described pouring milk in your strawberry cereal as a glittering magnificent water fall, skimming over the mountain and little strawberry citizens.
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i am one UTI away from banning your fingers from my vagina
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
People will say "JOE YOU MUST TURN DOWN" and I will refuse, in the name of liberty.
You know you were way drunk when you wake up at 7 AM halfway on a couch, tangled in a sheet with your shoes still on.
He played with my nipples while singing "How great thou art"
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
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