Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
a queef is a wish your heart makes.
He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
There are pictures of you on the shoulders of some old guy dressed as borat
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
Turns out he's old enough to be my dad. I'm so excited. I've never had a sugar daddy before. What should I ask for first!? Want anything?
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
Did you drink ALL that 151??
No. We drank all the jaeger... Then used the 151 to start the fire. We're also out of paper towels... And your hairspray is flammable.
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
There is a car windscreen wiper in my handbag... Not my car's, not ok.
My vagina needs a break, I had to ice it with a beer bottle last night.
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
Btw I appreciate you as a friend for taking the time to validate my sluttiness
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