What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
and now her best friend is massaging my table under the leg. this may not end well.
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
He legit asked if he could come over for a hug. I feel like I've been booty called by a 12 year old.
IDK DUDE BUT HE TIED IT WITH A SHOELACE SO I GOTTA FREE SHOELACE OUTTA THE DEAL. THIS GIVES A NEW MEANING TO LACED DRUGS
You came over, called every girl Comrade Heather, and then declared that you were an Eagle, and we were your young.
So all in all, a good night.
AND I woke up to eggs in my bra. Thanks Taco Cabana...
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
Are you drunk already?
Not already - at LAST.
I am downtown smoking a joint with Woody Harrelson...Because our car won't start. I will be there as soon as I can.
I'm literally trying to cool beer down right now in my car by putting it on my floor and blasting cold air on it
Randomize