So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.
At what number of girls whose last names are stored in your phone book as drinking establishments does it become excessive?
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
1 be hot 2 flirt with everyone 3 use hotness to make people do things for you. It's a simple model.
By the end of the night I was using him as a leg rest and he was handing me pizza rolls when I wiggled my hand. It's a proven method.
And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
I can't straight up say the only reason I smoked a couple bowls with you was for your three legged cat
Remember how he wouldn't sleep with me "out of respect"? Well, Mr. Respect just fingered me in a parking garage.
I feel like the devil is trying to impregnate me through my eyeballs.
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
I was so high I didn't realize I'd put on someone else's bra. I thought my boobs had shrunk.
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
Randomize
