I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
Just found out what was wrong with Esther. Turns out she's 33 and still not married. This explains everything.
I feel like Captain Blackout doesn't do her justice. Brigadier General Blackout is much better.
He ate me out and then left in a hurry and shouted "Sorry to dine and dash" as he left my house
The cop only confirmed I'm .22% Irish. Then I threw up on him.
i always knew that i'd have sex in your room, i just assumed it would be with you
the bouncer watched the girl drop her ID, saw me pick it up and say OMG SHE LOOKS LIKE ME, and then let me use it to get into the bar
Whoever owns the butter that i always steal out of the office fridge definitely put THC butter in there this time. Shit just got real.
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
Yeah but if you conceived a child on a park slide that would be pretty awesome
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
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