there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
I wish Pampers made couches for people like us.
What. The. Fuck. No, you will not spank me.
That wasn't intended for you, my bad.
literally have a bruise on my forehead from being over the toilet all night.
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
Some old truck driver just made me smell his beard I hope tonight turns out better
I seriously told a stripper I would hold her hand when she goes to get ass implants.
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
I don't want his dick, I want his flame thrower!!
while on the topic of showers...why is there apple juice in our bathtub?
he's annoying when i'm sober but vaguely hot when i'm drunk so yes i do have a preference and it goes by the name of vodka
Totes just ripped ass and the bartender's eyes got wet
Randomize
