no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
I don't appreciate you drunk dressing passed-out me in spandex for bed
My pupils are so HUGE you can see into my soul from 2 miles away
I snorted a few ambien and woke up here. A lady banged on our door, waking us up, demanding our towels.
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
I just hit on a guy in a doughnut store... is that too suggestive?
IM NOT TALKING TO YOU UNTIL YOU MAKE A PROCLAMATION YOU LOVE ME MORE THAN TACOS
I feel like if he almost got me pregnant once, i can at least say hi in a bar
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
Heeyy... sorry I got so drunk. You probably don't ever want to see me again. Thank you for dealing with me when I tried to jump over the deli counter for some mayonnaise.
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
so i'm with my friends driving on the highway and just saw a guy in the car next to us sucking on a dildo. can't make this shit up.
Randomize
