Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
my being single is dangerous.
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
Judging by the crutches in the living room I take it you two are fine and we aren't going out tonight?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We are going to be Siegfried and Roy for Halloween and you are going to be the tiger.
I can't be 100% sure of this but I think tonight was the first time I told a middle aged woman holding a baby to go fuck herself
May or may not have just lost a contact hanging out Anthony's sunroof. Drunk. Hint: I can only see out of one eye right now.
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
I don't care if he's the coolest coworker, if he's living in his mom's basement at 30 you should not buy drugs from him
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like, I don't need to know your life dude. I just need you to suck my tits.
I ACCIDENTALLY SUPER LIKED HIM. I JUST DELETED TINDER FROM MY PHONE.
This is why we can never be just regular friends. The shit we do is not regular
Let the clothes fall where they may.
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
just threw up in a gas staton parking lot in front of a father and son. stared them in the eyes and finished like a boss
Randomize