I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
Omg. Just talked to a semi driver from nebraska. Got her truck stuck. Gave her and her riding buddy a glass of vodka and a cig. YES.
i'm surrounded by gay midgets. not sure if i'm bragging or asking you to come rescue me. wait for follow up.
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
I wiped my mouth this morning with a pine tree branch after I threw up on the side of the road. Tis the season
I need a new pic for your contact id. Because your boobs popping up when I'm having dinner with my grandma or, ya know, when kids have my phone isn't so good.
You always seem to be able to bribe me with tequila and Mac and cheese. This relationship of ours will cause me health problems someday.
If I win the contest of drinking the most water I get a chicken nugget.
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
You know you had a good night when you wake up cuddling a baseball bat and a can of chicken noodle soup.
Did I try to sell your body for chicken tenders last night?
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
He's my blizzard buddy. We're blowing lines and doing a 3D game of thrones puzzle
Randomize
