I wish we could go back in time and find our best farts ever
Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
I just found glitter on my vibrator... whatever we're doing has to stop
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was cut off by 8, I need to rethink this breakup therapy strategy
They walked in to the store, ripped up the phone book, and left. Can we get on their level?
you did a full monologue with your sober self last night. different voices and everything.
I need to find out this kids work schedule. I need mustache rides on my lunchbreaks.
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Everytime I try to keep track of the amount of people I slept with I always forget about that guy I met on the dc metro, where I woke up to him organizing his Special K and Molly and I was covered in sleeping cats.
So we hooked up and then instead of texting me, he endorsed me on LinkedIn for Microsoft Word a few days later
Grilled cheese and shark week. Unemployment done right.
THIS THING HATES MY LIVER
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
Randomize