So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
dude, when you're random girl from last night came down the stairs this morning she fell all the way down. I laughed. She just walked out. I hope shes ok. Tell her I give her a 10 for that landing though.
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just tell her a well fed dog doesnt stray far from the porch, and if that doesnt work just keep fucking her sisters
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
come home. i made deep-fried hotdogs; don't let me die alone.
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
I'm pretty sure even the managers want me to show up hungover my last day, it would be negligent and disrespectful to do otherwise
A drag queen just ate a dollar out of my ass. I don't know which one of us has hit rock bottom
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
It's slightly odd going to a booty call during morning rush hour with everyone else going to work.
Randomize