I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
At least drunk you showered before switching sex partners last night.
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
Bren left me with a lovely parting gift. Newfouund alcoholism. I'm on the kitchen floor, hugging a bottle of vodka. It's my only friend now.
That's not a good night. A good night is waking up with no skirt, no money, and the imprint of the edge of the bar on your forehead.
I already ran out of vodka but I have more beer. I just ran naked into the high school party down the street as took all theirs. ...figured no one wants to tackle the naked guy..
Just spread butter on my bathrobe. This has been an ace morning.
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
You just wait. When you see me foam roll naked, you're going to lose your mind.
When she's hammered the amount of alliteration that comes out of her mouth is amazing.
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
I'm the only person I know that carries solo cups, shot glasses, ping pong balls, two decks of cards, and a lawn chair in his trunk. I'm ready to turn anything, anywhere into a party.
Randomize
