Come to the Burger King. We're waiting for you.
tonights recap: old cokehead freind proposed in the middle of a country bar to his trash girlfriend, saw ex-fuck who now has star shaved into his head and another with his gf, and ex-bfs best friends crackin jokes about who would fuck me first. NEVER COMING HOME AGAIN
there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule!
Wait are they playing beer pong to?
Where are you and why am I suddenly responsible for your taquitos?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
I have 39 hot sauces from Chipotle
It's like earning obesity badges
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Everyone thinks I'm sleeping but I'm actually just melting.
There is no way to say this. Dude, I peed your bed. No questions, no answers. My flight leaves in 30 minutes. Use my detergent. Also, THE VODKA IN THE FRIDGE IS YOURS.
Please tell me you did not shit your Disney princess costume.
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
DIBS on your mom for my beer pong partner.
I just puked on a sprinkler…Motherfucker tried to spray me
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