you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
Out of ice. Vodka+club soda+cut up lime popscicle=I'm an alcoholic genius.
29 Petty People Reveal The Shallow Reasons They Turned Someone Down
Just wondering did you put mouse traps and brownies on my porch?
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
I don't care how much you're grieving a loss, masturbating off the side of a roof is not acceptable mourning behavior.
Just skate-of-shamed, shirtless, with a bucket or margaritas. Good luck beating that one.
21 Horribly Evil Pranks To Play On Your Drunk Friends
You're like Jane Goodall in a forest of gay men. Someday your autobiography will be called "Bottoms in the Mist".
one of these days i'm gonna do a sparkly magical girl transformation into snoop dogg
After sending me a dick pic, he asked, "yay or nay?"
I told her I had a small penis. Then replied if Peter Pan won with a dagger then so can I
I had a dream I got back with Amanda. And then cheated on her the same day. Even my conscious is a dick
At one point my little brother was Rocky Balboa'd by a stripper's tit