Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
Taking the airport shuttle drunk should not happen this often in my life.
as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
is it still called a breakup if its your friends boyfriend that you have stopped sleeping with?
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
I've just never heard the term serendipitous used to describe having one's asshole licked.
She definitely peed in a bucket in their closet last night. We should warn them about that, right?
A blind guy just told me that even he could see i was gay and encouraged me to chat up the girl behind that counter bc he thinks we'd make a cute couple. Are all Canadians this helpful?!
Okay Im still jerking off but now with the Reality of Law School Looming In The Distance
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
I'm like a sensual ninja. You turn your head for a second and.... BOOM I'm naked. It's like a naughty magic trick.
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
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