hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
What a fucking waste of an outfit
never play flip cup with pint glasses
i was so drunk i stopped mid-blowjob to make sure he i was with my boyfriend and not some random. twice.
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina.
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
My professor laid down on the floor and told us a story that involved being naked covered in Vaseline with a pumpkin on your head. No lie. This is going to be a great semester.
I lowered my expectations when he started off saying "ah missionary, my specialty"
We are not having sex in the fucking kindergarten
Spent 38 bucks on dollar wells last night. I'm pretty sure my liver is staging a mutiny right now.
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
my personal favorite... An "I'm sorry you broke your finger and cant play sports for awhile" blowjob!
Randomize
