i just saw a man dusting the fake palm trees at the mall
...welcome to nebraska
don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
The weird kid in front of me is reading an article titled "why don't i have a girlfriend?" the article then continues to talk about the mathematical equation for obtaining a girlfriend. exhibit a of why he is single
she looked me in the eyes and called me a poet because i was singing lady gaga, then she fell over...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So instead of getting the if-you-hurt-my-little-girl-youre-dead talk, i got the alcohol-is-our-friend talk, i like her dad already
you're surprised the chick that fucked you for a free cup has herpes. i don't feel bad for you.
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
I am harder than a fucking diamond and Michael Bolton is playing. Your move.
Man the amount of drugs being done at a wedding with a bunch of surgeons was disturbing
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