You work out of a Hotel?
sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
I just woke up with streamers wrapped around me. Glitter in my hair. My fish are swimming in empty bottles of Barcardi. Helpppp
you woke me up in the middle of the night to tell me you were taking off your pants and it was not an invitation.
This titty bar has wifi. I just did FaceTime stage side
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
he told me to hold it and try to write my name in the snow and it seemed like a bonding moment because neither one of us had ever done that before. i didn't anticipate it vibrating and weirding me out therefore making me let go and get my hand peed on.
Every concussion has its silver lining
Alright, deal. Settling two drug deals before noon is what I call a productive day. I'm not even gonna go to math, I've practiced enough numbers for the day.
I've literally never felt worse
My body feels like its decomposing
That does it. We're drinking til we're pirates.
Let's try finding a bar where there aren't people who want to hang me from a tree by my nutsack
you made me suck your tit in the car and kept saying "good boy. I love you so much. good boy."
There is a video of you making out with him, flipping off the camera, and holding the plastic flamigo that you had just stolen out of a yard
Randomize
