Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
So I was just looking through the calendar on my phone seeing what day new years was on & on dec 31st at 9am it says "nude champagne toast". Guess we have to do it.
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
Definitely almost got hit in the face with a baby
The pregnant Hooters waitress told me to "make good choices".
Upperdeckered the toilet. Took sombrero off, drawing too much heat. Witnessed glassing. In bush, come findme.
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
I'm going to have to have a long talk with god if my soul mate has a prince albert
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
You were drunk at 5 You went to the dining hall and cried because your brain and fingers weren't working. Your RA came up to you and suddenly you became sober. I was very proud of you.
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
I supernannyed him into submission
I have 3 vacation days left and I'm guarding them like a gay dragon on a pile of gold dildos molded after celebrities.
Smaug the FABULOUS
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