I really wish I could go back in time to change the course of events that led to me sitting on the internet at 3 Googling 'Traumatic masturbation' while talking to you about failed dates, and running a virtual restaurant in a video game.
If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Theres a truck parked on the front yard and i just want to take this opportunity to tell you now that it is not my fault.
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drunk girl in a bikini just tried to bite my face, it's officially spring break
I love this text stream: discussing the development of a business model centered around cooking acid to bankroll a yacht trip in Croatia
Before we have sex for the first time I would like "eye of the tiger" to be playing to mentally prepare me for what I'm about to endure.
I feel like I'm in high school again. I'm completely sober and I just gave some guy a handjob to completion.
Hey. It's Michael. The guy that had his tongue in your mouth last night. Just wanted to check in with you.
He literally asked permission to hit on me
Randomize