Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
Flaming shots last night. Missing an eye brow. There a connection?
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
Sorry my hands just texted you
Is she okay?
She may want to issue revenge punches, but medically fine.
Now that I've quit blow, I think I'm allergic to my cat....
There is no way to say this. Dude, I peed your bed. No questions, no answers. My flight leaves in 30 minutes. Use my detergent. Also, THE VODKA IN THE FRIDGE IS YOURS.
I tried to bring you in when you passed out on the porch but all you said was that I "ruined your hope ands dreams of becoming an astronaut"
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
Randomize
