im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
after last night i think it would be a good idea if i wrote a will... you know, just in case.
my family just sang happy birthday to baby jesus. no ones even drunk yet
You kept whispering, no one does me like Jimmy Johns does me.
If this herpes test comes back negative I'm asking out the doctor.
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
Haha he was not a poor little guy. If he'd talked to me or something I might feel bad. But since I saw him groping other girls as well as myself there's no sympathy coming from me
He's just picking out the right girl. I do the same thing with fruit. Grope them, squeeze them, smell them. I have to know I'm getting quality fruit.
A part of me realizes this is a bad time to text. But I override it with my awesomeness
I can't promise that. They just put an extra shot in my margarita.
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
I'm drunk still and I cried and now I'm watching Whitney Houston singing the national anthem and I'm crying more
My vagina still hurts from yesterday. That's the last time I think riding a mop bucket is a good idea. Don't let me do that again
He howled at the moon then told me that if i were a dog he'd have sex with me...either i look like that girl or i need to stop going on blind dates. Period.
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