He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
Just realized after we're done pre-gaming for St. Patricks Day, we have March Madness, the first day of spring, and Easter to pre-game for. March is a great month.
Nothing says "get your life together" better than waking up in a tub full of your own vomit. Twice. In one night.
And a psychic told me I was pregnant and I am just so over life right now.
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
so... the fat chick just walked over, shook my hand, then introduced herself as "versatile". shoot me now.
It smells like someone died in our apartment and ya'll used some random orifice of his body to smoke weed out of. Side note, how did we get a guitar?
Well. I went to a frat party where they mixed gin and Mountain Dew. My kingdom for some olives and vermouth.
I'm sorry, the person you're trying to reach is WAYYY too high to deal with this right now.
If you want it you better put a ring on it. And by ring I mean one of my three favorite pies.
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
You don't make any sense
TEQUILA
Randomize
