He sent me a video of himself jacking off. I am not kidding.
WTF??? Isn't he married??
Yeah but his wife is at a birthday party and I guess he's bored. LOL
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
I'm sitting by the window waiting for the sun to go down so that I can start drinking.
last night i found out that about 5 of my friends audio recorded us having sex through the bedroom door, then auto tuned it in the tpain app on his iphone.
toilet paper cling ons are not as adorable as the little red cub makes them look on the charmin commercials.
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
new costume idea. paint swatches and a ball gag... I'll be 50 shades of grey.
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
Then you bent down and whispered, "excuse me mr. Stair, could you please stop moving?"
I'm glad our friendship can withstand laughing mid-blowjob during the diarrhea scene in Dumb & Dumber.
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
I gave her a cheerful high five and she turned to me and said, "we should do that with our genitals." I may have to marry this girl.
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