She got kicked off the plane and spent the last four hours in a holding cell with the feds.
but she's really nice
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
We got blackout for the alumni dinner, and then walked THROUGH the keynote speaker, managing to still say "excuse me".
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it.
Guess I'll put him on my to-do list too. But closer to the bottom since we dated before. That's almost unethical.
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
Pregnancy test = positive. Hope you still have our old guess who game 'cause daddy elimination begins now.
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
I just got a text giving me an hour window for when my vibrator is gonna be delivered. If that's not awesome customer service, I don't know what is.
If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.
I rewired his car so that every time he hits the gas the horn and the OnStar turn on every time he hits the brake the panic alarm goes off.
I got a pots and pans set and a vibrator. Merry Crisis.
Randomize
