You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
i gave you head in a backbend. if that doesnt say happy birthday i dont know what does.
We were laying in the basement dry humping to the rhythm of the washing machine
Dude. Apparently I just smoked some stuff that's used for Nigerian spirit quests.
Just so you know swallowing does not help chest colds. Your Phd can suck my dick
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
God it's like my stomach is full of drunk bees
Well, I woke up on a roll-away, with a knot in the back of my head and penis confetti stuck to me. Also, I apparently literally gave the shirt off my back right before I passed out, so I was topless. Vegas won this trip.
My FitBit tracked the calories I burned during sex. Hello 2015!
In the last 2 hours I managed to have romantic starlit sex on the beach as the tide came in with not only just a gorgeous man, but one who happens to be Eastern European and finishing Harvard law school.
Oh wow. I want to be you right now.
Add tweezing eyebrows to the list of things not to do while on adderol....
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
Randomize
