I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
Unless you watched your mom's very literal rendition of "I touch myself" while she was wearing a bikini, your vacation wasn't as bad as mine.
you threw up in someones recycling bin and left a note apologizing. how drunk do you think you were?!
i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again.
I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
My friend and I just coined a new term. OBJ. The obligatory blow job. You totally know what I'm talking about.
Like if he goes down on you first, or you just don't want to bone him yet. OBJ.
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
Just realized that St. Patty's is on a Saturday this year in case you were interested in coming to New York and redefining bender with me.
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
Can you come unlock the door? I just peed myself on the porch.
I bet your mom's never met a girl who's thrown up at the presidential inauguration before though.
Goal: finish my bio assignment before the Xanax kicks in.
At what point in a new hookup do you tell the guy you need to wear a mouth guard when you sleepover because of your TMJ? Asking for a friend.
Randomize
