Just tried to tap morse code on the wall seperating our beds to tell you I was awake and ready to smoke
everyone has their kryptonite. mine just happens to be 18 year old blonde girls.
Don't know how I even got in. I pulled my id out and threw it at the bouncer, and he just picked it up, checked it, and let me in.
Tell me you didn't have sex with my dad.
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
I wish my bank account would intervene on my life choices.. $200+ in alcohol in 2 weeks and a $40 McDonald's bill is a cry for help.
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
Haha no we did it on his bed. Then rolled off into the bean bag. It was a strangely athletic performance on my behalf.
If I send Ben a tit pic but I do it while wearing a Tom Brady mask is that funny or creepy
Why would you keep yourself in a sharting situation
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
I'm not saying I'm planning to hook up tomorrow but I'm also not saying I'm unprepared for it
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
I'm at home 4 xanax deep watching She's all that.. no I don't want to go out. The couch is eating me.
Randomize
