Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
I'm watching Intervention to get pumped up for tonight
my mom just asked me about sexting and if I have ever sent a naked picture to anyone. i fucking hate fox news.
Just had perfomance review. I was told the best example of my integrity was when I told my boss I was going to fail the random drug test due to my weekend coke binge. She said that took a lot of character.
If I knew losing weight would mean this many fucking creepers I would've just stayed fat.
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
You asked me to be the big spoon, when you passed out on the stairs
Not exactly sure why you felt the need to get the halloween decorations out. But waking up to 7 carved pumpkins really scares the shit out of you.
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
When you trip so hard that you can see your friends thoughts through their pupils.
don't take offense to this but at the strip club tonight I legit believed one girl was you. almost hopped on stage and freaked out at you. you're a beauty.
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
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