He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
This hotel is not contributing to my sobriety, they have 4 kinds of free wine and beer.
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
I was preparing to do my walk of shame shirtless, but then I found my sweater, wallet and keys neatly piled under a tree in the park.
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
I got punched in the face by a Cowboy last night. Then he bought me a beer cause o convinced security not to kick him out the bar. Start of a fairytale love story? I think so.
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
I can't ever look his wife in the eye again. She will see right through my soul to his dick pic.
I'm so drunk and angry about the Michigan game the fact of my relationship being over doesn't matter
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she cant stop having the shits.
Randomize
