Come here. I'm drunk. Family Function. Intense Pro-life vs. Pro-choice debate. Bring Republicans.
It saddens me that girls will never know the wonder feeling of pulling your sweaty nutsack off of your leg.
It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
it's like a walk of shame rule, you always run into someone who saw you wearing that yesterday
I just remembered you had me meet your law professor while I was wasted...how'd that go?
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
Remind me in the morning that I've now seen a guy do crack. That actually happened. I'm at the wrong party.
We could put on there: "Drink jager bombs and do stupid shit faster, with more energy!"
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
I still can't believe a guy pooped in my backyard
I booty texted him nothing but three exclamation points at 3:05am and he was in my bed 17 minutes later, lest you think punctuation is not important.
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
Randomize
