it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
I think I just got a contact from my own exhale. Def dying.
I won't go into too much detail about this but you should probably wash your sheets. In bleach. Or just burn them. Thanks for letting me sleep in your bed bro. Enjoy scotland.
It's either my own vomit or popcorn butter in my ear right now. Banking on the second one.
We made popcorn last night. So it's both
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
I got tossed from adult league soccer for telling a 55 year old I'd break his hip. I'm a productive member of society
I'm turning twenty & the only honorable way to exit my teens is by slapping the fuck outta the bag. You better be in.
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
I know you all think its cute to drop me off in a different state when I black out, but I can't wake up in family campgrounds asking where I am. These parents are scared.
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
What eyeshadow color says "yes I am at the dentist, and yes I am hungover please don't judge my life choices"
I want to share a beverage of the alcoholic category with you, but I'm conflicted about getting out from under my covers.
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
Randomize
