I specifically asked you not to be slutty tonight.
her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
Will do. If it all falls thru I'm just gonna set up a sprinkler in my back yard and run thru it while taking jello shots. Perfect alternative to my 29th bday.
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
So I got hit in the face with a frying pan. So def wont be at work for first break if I'm there at all
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
I can't even masturbate anymore!! That was my last source of cardio!!
Also, there's the possibility of falling 5 feet to your death to make it more exciting
In which case I will yell FIVE SECOND RULE and continue to slam you
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
I made out with drunk Joe Dirt and then put his mullet wig on for him. True Halloween romance.
Haha, how do I word that nicely? "You got me to the edge of no return twice and failed to let me orgasm, therefore you owe me chicken nuggets or hot wings. Your decision"
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
Want to help me interview candidates to replace my Cub/Boy Toy when he leaves for grad school next month?
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