What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
we're doing shots for every degree below freezing it is outside
Also, just saw a homeless man answer a phone call on a blackberry...
I got cut off for calling the flower girl a slut. What are you doing?
I just had a formal request to dress as a boyscout for my meeting with Legal on Friday. From Legal. Time to go home.
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not
He was with one girl when I went to bed, wad with another when I woke up and now he just told me he was with a 3rd in-between last night and this morning. Jesus Christ.
He just gave himself a boner while driving using "the power of his mind"
When I come over I'm bringing "Socky" the Alcoholism Prevention puppet, today he is going to tell you boys about his FAVORITE word---its called "moderation"
Cuz I feel like I ate the whole candy isle at 7/11 last night and chased it with rum
You pretty much did tho
He and I are in a competition of who can sleep with the most people at work. We're tied at two. I could win this if they'd stop hiring damn straight girls.
I've also stopped shaving, like, everything. I can't tell if I'm empowered or sad
He told us when he was 10 he started shoving bars of soap up his ass for pleasure so i winked at him
Randomize