She STILL went home with me even when I said yes when she asked if I had an infectious disease. Turns out she asked if I had an infectious spirit...well she has my infectious spirit now
I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
Reggie can tackle my bush.
I woke up pulling sunflower seeds out of my vagina. That kind of night.
I can't. I think his penis is about to take out a restraining order against me.
This is what we get for YOLOing our way to obesity
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
Who needs sounds of the ocean? I just fall asleep to whatever chubby he is banging next door.
If you sleep with another manager before the year is up you'll deserve an accomplishment sticker.
Hey kevin, it's Ashlee. I have been trying to get ahold of you. Your pledge gave me your number. I really wanted to apologize for shitting in your car I'll buy new upholstery or pay to have it shampooed if needed. I'm so embarrassed.
while giving me head, she stopped, looked up at me smiling and said "ill never be able to look at bananas the same way again" and then went back to work.
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
I just used a coke ridden $20 bill to buy Girl Scout cookies
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