If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
The last thing I remember is your grandma calling me a pussy and taking my shot for me. Your family is awesome.
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
The highlight of the night was when he yelled "WAS THIS CONDOM MADE FOR TODDLERS??"
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
She just left someone a voicemail saying 'you better not have plans Saturday night, cause I'm going to sit on your face.'
The guy who was interviewing me asked if I had coke on my pants. You win this time Las Vegas
I don't think it's ever a good night if I'm this hung over and I didn't even get an orgasm out of the deal...
Turns out the guy I did all that coke with the other night is a cop
We're dating now
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