He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
His pubic hair was longer than his dick
so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
Grandma was not a fan of the beer-can ornaments. Not "traditional".
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
Sooo just headbutted a stripper, meet you outside
Wow. This hand sanitizer smells awesome. It's like I just gave a handjob to a fruit basket.
I'd cum for enchiladas.
Every time you visit for the weekend I end up having to bleach my entire house after.
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
I just licked wine off my own thigh. I've hit a new low.
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
I swear to god, I'm like....the Jedi master of dick.
Randomize
