Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me
I've never seen anyone write a check for a bar tab before
OMG the post office opened my dildo! "we sincerely regret the damage to your package"
we went to the bar with our boss and you tried to play a song from the atm machine
Got a minor my first day of college from the bike police. I'm gonna like it here
seriously the second he called my tits warlocks was the second I knew I wasn't going to fuck him.
Bringing my mom Taco Bell and weed. I'm such a good daughter
You gave me the best orgasm of my life. I'm buying you a house
You thought you were Snapchating on your tablet, but were really just poking John Stamos' face on my Full House dvd case...
Her name was Danica but I felt like it would be hard to say drunk so I called her Shelby
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
We got to the hospital and the girls who caused the accident had already added you on facebook.
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
Randomize
