i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
I can't tell if I miss summer or 5 times a day sex more.
What the fuck could you be doing in that room to make her yell "Beginners Luck!" over and over again?
Texas State Troopers call you ma'am even when they arrest you for public nudity and after you've puked on their cruiser. Country boys raised right.
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
You said you couldn't look at me because you would have to take off your sunglasses but you can't because they're the "guides to your eyes".
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
I just connected with one of your drug dealers on LinkedIn.
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
He texts me "just to say hi" and then tells me how hard he is and sends me a dick pic. And I'm like, dude, I'm ordering a burrito right now
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
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