I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
I feel like I wont be making enough money to support my frivilous lifestyle of beer and mcdonalds
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
There's s woman at the corner of the bar dancing by herself in her seat and making eye contact with me. Please hurry.
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
Watched an eagle swoop down and eat a rabbit on my walk back from your place, literally too high to handle this right now
Last night at the bar you we're seriously going up to people and pushing through them like they were bowling pins and you were a bowling ball
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried
I don't get it. If he broke into Taco Bell at 2 am, then why couldn't he have brought me home a fucking taco???
Just got home from work. I'm going to change into sweats for a while before I have to wear normal pants to the party like I promised.
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
one of my students asked me today if i was having a baby. fuckin 4 year olds and their lack of filter. time to get back to the gym i guess
Randomize
