If that was your dad, he is hot
I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
I got so high that I decided to drive with my knees on the way home. Where am I going in life?
Nowhere
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her.
Sorry I didn't text you for coffee this morning...bad life decision Saturday sorta rolled into Monday...
She climbed through the window and into my bed. Not even sure who she is. Was thinking she might be a friend of yours?
I can't believe I paid your booty call for a ride home in cake.
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"
When I said to shut up, I meant it. I'm sorry you have a bald spot now, but it was necessary.
He saved you from those guys at the club, took you home, and made you breakfast. If this isn't your come to Jesus moment IDK what is.
Shaving your bikini line at 11 at night in the Walmart bathroom feels trashy no matter why you're doing it.
Can you come unlock the door? I just peed myself on the porch.
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