I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
I like daylight savings. I don't care if it's 4 oclock it's not daydrinking if it's dark out
seek help.
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
So the coke mirror was perfectly angeled at my face right when i woke up this morning. I now know how I'd look on intervention.
And why did 3 people fail to stop me from literally getting a piggy back ride from the bar to his apartment?!
Call me when you wake up. I wanna start drinking but I'm giving up hope on my life if I drink alone before 10 am
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
I mean he did ask and he said it's cold out but i didn't realize we were that comfortable hahaha sex is one thing but borrowing a sweatshirt?
Locking that text forever.
who was i chillin with last night? i woke up in a storage unit
I watched you down those shots like a lion cub watching its mother rip apart a gazelle
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
I'm gonna be the best dressed mother fucker to ever get kicked out of that damn bar.
The only people allowed to make me cry are myself and Chris Hemsworth as Thor. And me.
But we made up last night and had unbelievably crazy sex tonight. I legit went blind for like 15mins from him choking me. It was awesome
I got dominos and had to stop whilst eating and take a moment of silence for how good it was
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