But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
He wanted a handjob during a John Wayne movie. I just couldn't find it in my heart to disrespect that man. John Wayne that is.
Note to self not a good idea to try and make out with a girl when she's crying over her boyfriend
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
somehow a sneeze triggered me puking over everyone in the car
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
I made her a sippy cup with eggnog and whiskey. My meditation app told me to go the extra mile for someone today, so I did.
I show up hung over with mcdonalds. Why wouldn't he have sex with me? It's a fucking leap year...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Robert just walked in drunk, grabbed my Jameson from me, told me to let him do his thing, and spilled it all over the coffee table. Then he told me to grab a funnel because he was going home.
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
I just got a lap dance from a sexy cop in return for giving him his sunglasses back. I think this is going to be the beginning of a really great friendship
The police report said "I asked the suspect if he had any identification. He replied yes and gave me a Pizza Hut gift card"
He asked me who my new boyfriend was and I showed him a picture of my sex toys.
How did your walk of shame include a trip to Walmart and how did you bump into the cop that arrested you last night there?
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