Cut to me doing the walk of shame to work from a hotel.
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
Woke up on the kitchen floor cuddling with the dummy we made of you. Hope your internship is going well.
She was telling me which girls she thought I should fuck or not at the bar. Why can't all one night stands be that cool after?
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
Was my shirt on fire at any point last night? Because I'm fairly sure my shirt was on fire.
All he did was like my Instagram picture and I'm already planning how to turn down sex with him this weekend...
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
You can't Tinder AND have him bring you icecream in the same night. It messes with your vagina.
I survive off of bourbon and the tears of others only
I woke up naked next to my hot manager. Left before she woke up, and worked an entire shift with her. She has no idea.
Randomize
