ok what kind of idiot turns down casual afternoon sex?
we are going to smoke at least three blunts before we go see Cloudy with a chance of meatballs. I'm going to have my mom make us spaghetti for when we get out so can your mom make those spicy meatballs? I thought I'd give you 9 days notice so everything's perfect.
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
Taking my tights off outside the club to give them to the homeless man was my contribution to humanity. The fact that it was snowing just made me feel like superman.
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
How's your threesome situation going?
Optimistic
Well after last night I am convinced he is real life Tyler Durden. He only exists to me and somehow keeps me out of jail this entire time
Is "sorry I booted you out mid-fuck last night" a good icebreaker?
He's in a nude suit, bald, with a pink headband and a black sharpie streak down his forehead.
This guy is clearly nuts his idea of a hangover cure is a six pack poured into a camelpack then hiking 3 miles with a weighted vest. He said "learned it in the army i guess drink beer beat the heat"
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
I just left and he walked me out and went call me if you're ever... Eh... Whatever. And walked away.
He said he couldn't fuck me cause I kinda looked like my brother
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
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