Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
In the midst of you puking your guts out, you stopped, looked at the globe in front of you and whispered "America.."
I have a huge bruise on my thigh that I am 95% sure is due to you repeatedly throwing me over couches.
When I picked you up, you were drinking Maker's Mark out of the bottle with a crazy straw.
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
You yelled "NICE PAJAMAS" at a construction worker wearing a reflective jumpsuit while we rode past on a bike taxi
Drinking wine while working. Yay.
Just had sex at the YMCA.
We are so productive today.
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
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