I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
just woke up in my car, in front of the bar. Took me 10 minutes to find my keys which were about 10 yards away in a bush. According to my phone records, I called my ex 14 times last night. Breakfast?
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
I'm pretty sure I just discovered what the American Dream is said the person eating a hotdog for breakfast in bed in her underwear
Imma do me. And by that, I mean I'm going to walk across campus still drunk at 9am on a Tuesday.
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
He told me he doesn't want to fuck anymore because he needs to focus on school. Either he grew a vagina or he's secretly gay, it has to be one of the two.
...and as she's going down on me I look at the speedo and I'm doing 15 under, with 6 cars tailgating me, and I know her parents saw her head pop up because they were the car right behind us.
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
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