If I were trying to take advantage of you I would have maxed out all your credit cards by now.
No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
we tried have sex after i gave him a handjob. he wouldnt get hard and kept saying his little boy is broken.. please come get me
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
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I shouldn't have to thank you for taking off your captain hat off before we had sex
If you're fucking that other dude, I'll take the sloppy seconds. I don't care.
I really don't want to. I just don't know how to nicely say "dude I'm having a rough time in life right now and I just need to dress like a stripper cop, get shit faced, and have dirty crazy sex"
Bad news: I found out that girl you want has a boyfriend. Good news: she'll probably cheat on him with you. Better news: after seeing the way she treats him, that's the most interaction you're going to want with her anyway. Trust me.
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think it's time to give up this life and become vikings. You in?
Ps he swallowed my earring last night so yeah
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
How’s the date going?? Do you think he’s gonna cut your face off and wear it to his birthday party?
Youre a wreck. Youll be in your dorm weeping to project runway covered in pizza sauce and smelling of stale beer
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
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