the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
we just plugged the camera up to the big screen. would you like to come see what you did last night, in high definition?
She greeted me with a new giants jersey and an opening day blowjob. this is true love.
After four attempts, his condom would not flush. I had to remove it with salad tongs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
nah we got kicked outta the bar after the bouncer saw us putting straws up Chelsea's nose to make her look like a walrus after she fell asleep at the table
I didn't want to walk to anymore parties because I found a cat. It was magical.
It's gay pride, I'm in my EMT uniform getting more girls than your straight ass ever will..
My one regret (beside the inevitable shit storm that followed) is that now I can't fuck his cute friend.
I think it's safe to assume that dad heard you lose your lesbian virginity last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm fucking blazing boy. 5hr weed sauce kicked in and my entire face feels like an 8ball of gold bond flying down a mountain of Fresh powder. Just gliding.
guess who got crunk and thought it would be a good idea to give herself a pixie cut?
THOUGHT
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
you asked if you could borrow my vagina for the night
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
its a comptetion of fuckups and im HERE TO WIN
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