Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
The tornado sirens were going off and everyone just ran to the liquor store. .
I'm trying to think of how to explain to the dentist tomorrow that I think I pulled my jaw muscle eating pizza while drunk.
Ignoring the crisis im in. Sitting in the front yard in a kiddie pool. Wearing arm floaties, fins and a snorkel. Waiting for a hot guy to walk by.
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
All I could think about when I saw her was that she could be the mother of my future first round draft picks
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
the quiet that you are hearing is a silent suggestion that you should go fuck yourself
You can get gift cards to the liquor store! This changes everything.
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
Honestly his girlfriend says she hates me cause she thinks im trying to get him to cheat on her with me...she should hate me cause i already accomplished that.
Randomize
