end the night at a gay bar...not sure how...but why the fuck do i have two condoms in my pocket?
I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
just found more coke in my pocket. i love not washing my jeans after every individual use.
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
Fuck a-yeah! I just found a wine key. Let 'Don't Fuck With Me Friday' commence.
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
So I was bartending last night and this guy w/ his gf said that he recognized me, so I asked him, "do you watch a lot of gay porn?"
I'm getting "congrats on your engagement" shots. I need to get engaged more often!
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
Get over your kidney infection all ready. You have been sober for too long.
I never thought I'd be on my couch watching Star Trek, getting my tits rubbed while crying.
Randomize
