i was rollin on her like bob the builder
I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
the lady at Walgreens winked at me when i asked where the cherry chapstick was... damn u katy perry!
Never eat 3 McGriddles and drink a carton of milk. It's like you're successfully killing self but you're alive.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This Xanax laced vodka tonic will help me forget that all these spring breakers are all young enough to have been my students.
When the cops knocked on the door, he just knocked back and announced "house keeping"
Never ever ever ever ever ever give your number to a 30 year old at buffalo wild wings. Ever ever ever.
Tell me not to purchase 500 ball pit balls and a kiddy pool
No
I found you walking along the street hammered. You walked up said hi and handed me a beer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So... I may have accidentally just sat on a strip of a home waxing kit.. naked... Assistance is definitely needed....
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
Do you think if I had a tempurpedic bed he would still be able to feel me fingering myself after we have sex?
this morning's inventory: a top hat, two empty bottles of everclear, half a slim jim, cigars, tiara, pot necklace, and some fishnets. and that's just my purse.
When they said they were gonna tattoo each other's gamer tags on their asses, I knew I no longer had a boyfriend.
They don't really make a "hey I'm fucking your ex wife" card do they ?
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